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Posts Tagged ‘Eddie Murphy’

SPICE UP YOUR WORLD!!

Who’s ready for a Spice Girls comeback? Come on, raise those hands high…….?

Well, SOMEone is ready. And someone upstairs (at Victoria’s Secret) loves those girls. Their new ‘greatest hits’ album will be distributed EXCLUSIVELY at Victoria’s Secrets stores worldwide.

Wow. That is some deal. Why? Melanie B. explains…

“They do great bras, and every girl wears a bra. And they should – at some point in their life. Unless they don’t need to wear one,”

Yes! Well put, Scary.

You know, when I read this I ignorantly thought to myself, greatest hits? Why, they couldn’t have more than that one album which would by default be their greatest hits!

WRONG! Once I had done my research, I found that their extensive discography includes, in addition to their obvious hit Spiceworld, Singalonga Spice, the karaoke album, Viva Forever CD1 Enhanced, and Forever. Not to mention their DVD catalog: Zig-a-zig-Ahhh the unauthorized DVD. And Spice World. Obvs.

Then for a while I thought they were doing REALLY well, and even had their own channel. (NSFW) I was a little mistaken on that one.

But bringing your attention back to the original People article on this phenomenon, aptly titled Bra Power!!… they offer more news:

The partnership also extends to television: Baby (Emma Bunton), Ginger (Geri Halliwell), Scary (Mel B.), Sporty (Melanie C.) and Posh (Victoria Beckham) will perform during the annual Victoria’s Secret fashion show, which tapes in Los Angeles on Nov. 14 and airs on CBS Dec. 4.

Posh is the only with whose name is live-linked! That a harsh commentary by the heartless bastards at people.com. scary-eddie.jpgscary-eddie.jpg

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Scary is saying to herself, did I have Eddie Murphy’s illegitimate baby for nothing?

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Ginger is saying, did I launch my solo career and get nominated for THREE Brit awards for nothing?

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Baby is saying, did I appear on Strictly Come Dancing, the British precursor to Dancing with the Stars, for nothing?

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Sporty is saying, did I record a cover of I Want Candy that peaked at no. 24 on the British Charts (um, ??) for NOTHING?!?!?

Please, People.com, do not ignore the successes and failures of the girls. They work hard for their lost fame. Even if they’re not scientologists, they are still worthy of html links in their names.

So I applaud you, Spice Girls of yore! But ladies, go with what you know! What the shit kind of promo shot is this? You need some pigtails, tube tops, and open screaming mouths, stat. See you at Vicky’s!

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Yaaay!!!

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Apparently Vincent Pastore, from The Sopranos, is no longer a contestant on the new season of Dancing With the Stars. Guy dropped out of the competition before it even began. Loser. You know who Vincent Pastore reminds me of? That other cast member of The Sopranos who competed in that vh1 show, Fat Celebrities– Let’s Eat. Or maybe it’s called Celebrity Fit Club. Either way, Pastore’s cast mate actually gained 14 pounds during the first two weeks of taping. It’s one thing to not lose weight on a “weight loss” show, but to actually gain weight is a whole other story. And Jesus Christ, 14 pounds? That’s not even something that can easily be accomplished. You have to be really dedicated to putting as much food as humanly possible into your body. What was this man eating? Bricks…of lard? For crying out loud.

Well, I guess it just goes to show, The Sopranos men like to eat and not exercise. And gain 14 pounds in a fortnight.

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Jerk.

Sources say Eddie Murphy stormed out of the Academy Awards shortly after Alan Arkin took the oscar for Best Supporting Actor. I can comisserate with Eddie. It’s like that time I didn’t win the hand carved birdhouse at our church raffle when I was in second grade, and I cried.

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