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Archive for the ‘Weekend at the Movies’ Category

Wall-E
The Plot: The story of a robot that looks like Johnny Five and talks like a mogwai.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. Very much so. Although I think it will be hard for anything to compare to the wonder that was Ratatouille, this sounds like it’s going to be great. It’s already got a 97% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, which is the highest of anything so far this year. If you want to see a movie this weekend, make this a priority.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street, Park Slope Pavilion.

The release of Wall-E is getting me wet. Oh no!

Wanted
The Plot: I don’t really know. But there’s guns and explosions and an emaciated Angelina Jolie.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Hm…to be honest, it looks pretty fun. The negative reviews thus far (ahem, Austin Chronicle), while trying to criticize, seem to be highlighting the more appealing points of summer movies. That it’s ridiculous, unbelievable, filled with special effects, and is aimed at thirteen year old boys (read: twenty-five year old men who still act like thirteen year old boys). Maybe it’s my fondness for Angelina Jolie, or people with spaghetti string arms, bit I’m going to say that this looks like a fun evening at the cinema.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street, Park Slope Pavilion.

 

Angelina Jolie.

Trumbo
The Plot: A documentary about blacklisted screenwriter Dalton Trumbo.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. Dalton Trumbo gave us the scripts for films like Spartacus and Roman Holiday, but was a member of the anti-fascist Popular Front in the 1930’s. The documentary is directed by Peter Askin (Company Man) and features interviews with Joan Allen, Paul Giamatti, Kirk and Michael Douglas and Donald Sutherland.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Landmark Sunshine.

 

Gunnin’ For That #1 Spot
The Plot: A basketball documentary by Beastie Boy Adam Yaunch.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Probably not. Reviews thus far are pretty mixed, and the Beastie’s previous documentary – Awesome I Fuckin’ Shot That – was more of a rental.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: AMC Loew’s Village VII.

 

Finding Amanda
The Plot: Mattew Broderick plays a compulsive gambler who is sent to Vegas to convince his stripper neice to go to rehab.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Probably worth renting. Writer/director Peter Tolan has written a lot of crap (Bedazzled, America’s Sweethearts, Just Like Heaven, Stealing Harvard, Guess Who – wow that’s a long list) but he also is a writer and co-creator for the awesome show Rescue Me. This looks a lot darker than the other crap he’s made, and Matthew Broderick is great in darker material.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Landmark Sunshine.

Otherwise, Clue is the midnight movie tonight at the Landmark Sunshine and the IFC Center is playing Mad Max.

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For some reason, there’s barely anything coming out this weekend. I think it’s God’s way of telling you to go outside and fly a kite.

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

The Plot: The kids return to Narnia. One of them has sex with a fawn. It’s awkward.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. There are going to be plenty of blockbusters this summer, so I suggest you take a weekend off. The first installment in the series, in my opinion, was pretty bland. All the subtlety that the book had was abandoned in exchange for bad special effects, intense religious themes and forgettable acting. Plus, the only two actors who were on the right track last time, Tilda Swinton and James McAvoy, are now gone. While this one has the potential to be darker and more mature, I’m still not going to pay full price to see it in theaters. I’d rather see the BBC version again. The Ice Queen made me shit my pants.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Pavilion, Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street.

Reprise

The Plot: Two writers try to get famous, with different levels of success.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: It sounds like it. I’ve been reading some interesting reviews of this film so far (especially here). This is Danish director Joachim Trier’s first feature length film after having directed two award winning shorts.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Landmark Sunshine.

And that’s it. The midnight movie at Landmark Sunshine tomorrow is Dazed and Confused, and at the IFC Center it’s The Beales of Grey Gardens. Also, check out BAM‘s website for some upcoming screenings.

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Speed Racer

The Plot: Seriously, I have no idea. People were driving cars and there were lots of colors.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. Reviews are already pretty poor. I’ve seen the trailer a few times on the big screen, and even two and a half minutes of the film felt like someone had jammed six pieces of bubble gum in my mouth, spun me around for a half hour and kicked me in the forehead with a soccer cleat.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

What Happens In Vegas

The Plot: A movie is made based on the most annoying and overused catchphrase since “where’s the beef?”

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. Although to be fair, I hate Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz. And I hated the movie Just Married, to which this film looks identical. And I hate that the plot of this film revolves around Judge Dennis Miller sentencing the feuding couple to “six months hard marriage,” which is so ridiculous is would be out of place even in a 1960’s sitcom. The only thing that might make me watch this if it’s on cable when there’s nothing else to watch is that Zach Galifianakis (who needs to be in better movies) costars.  

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Pavilion, Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street.

The Fall

The Plot: A man tells a story to a young girl in the hospital.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Okay, so I doubt the plot line above does the film justice. You should watch the trailer. This is the newest film from Tarsem Singh, who directed the film The Cell, which was a beautifully filmed piece of garbage. From the trailer, I would say that Singh’s sophomore effort looks much better. Also, the film has been endorsed and released by both Spike Jonze and David Fincher. This is a film that it is hard to recommend, but I’m sure has to be seen on a big screen.  

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Landmark Sunshine.

Surfwise

The Plot: Documentary about an 85-year old surfer and sex guru who lives with his family of nine children on the beach in a small camper.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Advance reviews aren’t great, but this look like a fun movie, if you’re into these kinds of documentaries. Director Doug Pray has made a bunch of other documentaries including Big Rig, Infamy and Hype!.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: IFC Center.

The Tracey Fragments

The Plot: A girl hypnotizes her brother into believing that he is a dog, and then he disappears.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. The trailer looks like something pretty original, and the combination of Ellen Page in the lead role and a Broken Social Scene soundtrack can’t hurt. Director Bruce McDonald directs an adaptation of the novel by Maureen Medved.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: CC Village Cinemas East.

Poultreygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead

The Plot: A fried chicken restaurant is opened on Native American burial ground.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Only if you’re on acid. Troma director Lloyd Kaufman has directed plenty of other “classics” like Tromeo and Juliet and The Toxic Avenger. This film looks especially repulsive, but when was the last time you saw a movie that combined the genres of horror, musical, comedy and political satire?

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: CC Village Cinemas East.

Blue Velvet is playing as the Midnight Movie on Friday at the Landmark Sunshine, and the IFC Center is playing a midnight screening of Grey Gardens.

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Iron Man

The Plot: Summer blockbuster season begins with Tony Stark kicking ass surprisingly easily while wearing a suit made of iron.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. Who would have thought that the guy who directed Elf could make a superhero movie with a trainwreck (and insurance nightmare) like Robert Downey Jr. and have it work? But advance reviews have all been pretty great, and the trailer made me shit myself the first time I saw it. There are going to be a lot of superhero movies this summer (Dark Knight, Hancock, Hulk, Hellboy II), but Iron Man looks like it’s going to get us off to a good start.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Starting tonight (Thursday) at 8 there are shows at the Pavilion and the United Artists on Court Street.

Made of Honor

The Plot: Patrick Dempsey makes a total ass of himself.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. In addition to having the worst title I’ve heard since To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar, the biggest film on the director’s credits is City Slickers 2: The Legend of Curly’s Gold. The plot is pretty much My Best Friend’s Wedding, but reversed, except he’s also asked to be her maid of honor. Why they changed “maid” to “made” I don’t really know, and I don’t plan on finding out. 

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas and the Pavilion.

Son of Rambow

The Plot: A religious kid and a bully form an alliance to film their own version of Rambo.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. A few of us saw this last week at a screening and we all really enjoyed it. Many people are comparing it to Rushmore, but I think it has more in common with a movie like The Goonies. The kid actors are great, the soundtrack is fantastic, and it’s shot in an imaginative way. If you can’t get into Iron Man, definitely see this instead. Seriously, just look at the poster. Adorable.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Angelika.

Redbelt

The Plot: David Mamet makes an action movie?

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Uh…I guess? Advance reviews are pretty good, and David Mamet’s always at least pretty interesting. Chiwetel Ejiofor is a pretty talented actor. But seriously, why did David Mamet write a movie about jujitsu? And why is Tim Allen in it?

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Union Square.

Mister Lonely

The Plot: Michael Jackson impersonator finds a commune of other celebrity impersonators.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. Harmony Korine wrote Kids for Larry Clark when he was twenty-two years old, and then made films like Gummo, Ken Park and Julien Donkey Boy, all of which have gotten very strong (whether negative or positive) reactions from critics. Mister Lonely actually looks like it could be his most mainstream film ever, but, that being said, it also stars both David Blaine and Werner Herzog.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: IFC Center.

Fugitive Pieces

The Plot: A kid escapes from Poland during World War II and travels to Greece and Canada.

Is it worth eleven dollars?:

A conversation between discofries and myself:

me: so you saw fugitive pieces, right?

discofries: yeah, are reviews coming out?

me: no, i’m about to write weekend at the movies. did you like it?

discofries: yeah it’s a nice movie. well shot.

me: okay

discofries: and he’s pretty appealing. and there’s something to him b/c the women he hooks up w/ are HOTT. u can totally quote me on that. lol

me: alright so that’s hott with two t’s?

discofries: yes, yes it is.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Kew Gardens Cinemas.

Also, Holy Mountain is the midnight movie at the IFC Center tomorrow night and Alien: The Director’s Cut is playing at midnight tomorrow at the Landmark Sunshine. BAM is also screening Wong Kar Wai’s first movie As Tears Go By starting tomorrow.

 

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Baby Mama

The Plot: Amy Poehler has Tina Fay’s baby. Greg Kinnear smiles.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. I saw this earlier in the week with fellow BS’ers johnbaptisedme and disco fries. We all agreed that it wasn’t particularly good. Now I love me some Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. I also love me some Kinnear. So how that triumverate of awesomeness managed to fuck this movie up is beyond me. There are times when you feel like you’re watching a Meg Ryan comedy (notice how Tina Fey orders food in the exact same way) and the cookie-cutter ending is so boring and PG that it makes you want to barf.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street and BAM (seriously, BAM?).

Satan.

Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay

The Plot: Harold and Kumar are mistaken for terrorists.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Advance reviews are good so far, and if you found the first one amusing then chances are this is going to be more of the same (weed, naked people and light social commentary). This might be a good companion piece to Errol Morris’ Standard Operating Procedure (below).

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street.

Deception

The Plot: Ewan McGregor and Hugh Jackman have sex with hookers.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. This was scheduled to be released a while ago, and has been pushed back until now. It was written by the same guy who wrote Godsend and Live Free or Die Hard. While the fourth Die Hard wasn’t a bad movie, I don’t think anyone was talking about how well scripted it was (You just killed a helicopter with a car!).  

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: United Artists on Court Street.

Deal

The Plot: Burt Reynolds mumbles things about poker.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: No. I can’t even figure out where it’s playing (but it is apparently going to open somewhere). Even the movie’s website doesn’t know (but the trailer looks terrible). That’s not a good sign. The film stars Burt Reynolds and Bret Harrison, who is on CW’s Reaper and I believe is Zach Braff’s slightly less annoying cousin.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: No clue.

Bret Harrison: Acting with Hair Gel.

Roman De Gare

The Plot: A popular writer who is seeking characters for her new novel becomes obsessed with a recently escaped serial killer.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. This movie is getting great reviews, and writer/director Claude Lelouch has already made some fantastic films including the Oscar Winning Un Homme Et Une Femme. He’s been making movies since the early sixties, and Roman De Gare is already being hailed as one of his best.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Angelika.

Standard Operating Procedure

The Plot: Errol Morris’ new documentary about suspected terrorists at Abu Ghraib.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. I’ve only seen one Errol Morris documentary, but fellow Brooklyn Skeptic discofries is a longtime fan, and I’m sure she can attest that Standard Operating Procedure will be a riveting piece of documentary filmmaking (also, Danny Elfman did the score!).

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Angelika.

Then She Found Me

The Plot: Helen Hunt has a nervous breakdown.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: I’m going to say no, but I don’t like Helen Hunt, and I never have. The idea that she adapted, directed and stars in a movie makes me terrified. The film also stars Bette Midler, Colin Firth, Ben Shenkman and Matthew Broderick.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Landmark Sunshine.

Also, The Visitor is expanding to BAM, the Sunshine is playing the relatively new Control as their midnight movie tomorrow night and the IFC Center is playing Harmony Korine’s Gummo as their midnight movie.

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Chaos Theory:

The Plot: Uptight suburbanite decides to embrace chaos.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Probably not. Advance reviews aren’t great, and the director’s last effort, Pretty Persuasion, was a big mess of a movie. That being said, the trailer is amusing and dark, and Ryan Reynolds can be very funny when given the proper material. I doubt this will expand much however.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Landmark Sunshine.

Street Kings:

The Plot: Keanu Reeves is a pissed off LAPD officer who exposes some police corruption, cleans up the streets, plays by his own rules and…other cop clichés.

Is it worth eleven dollars? I’m actually going to say yes. If you like movies about corrupt cops, this is probably going to satisfy you. It’s based on a James Ellroy (L.A. Confidential, The Black Dahlia) story and from director David Ayer (Harsh Times, and writer of Training Day). So the people behind this movie certainly know their material. With a backup cast that includes Forest Whitaker, Hugh Laurie, Cedric the Entertainer, Common and Jay Mohr (!), I think this is going to be a kick ass cop movie for the whole corrupt, gun-toting, drug dealing family.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Park Slope Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

Prom Night:

The Plot: Murderer kills students on prom night.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Uh…yes? Tell me what would be more entertaining than sneaking beer into a theater on Friday and watching a bunch of annoying teens get stalked by a serial killer? Nothing. That’s what.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Park Slope Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

Smart People:

The Plot: A professor has health problems, has his half brother move in with him and starts dating a doctor.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: It’s hard to say. Parts of it look exactly like Sideways. Instead of Paul Giamatti as a failing writer, we have Dennis Quaid as a depressed Carnegie Mellon English professor. Instead of Thomas Haden Church as the crass and selfish best friend, we have…uh…Thomas Haden Church as the crass, selfish adopted brother. Also, here are a few things that we can determine about Smart People just based on the poster art (below).

  1. Smart People have facial hair.
  2. Smart People dress like they’re in the seventies, often wearing schoolgirl outfits, corduroy and tweed.
  3. Smart People make goofy expressions.
  4. Smart People like Scrabble. But unless they’re hitting some double word scores or triple letter scores, they should realize that the words “smart” and “people” aren’t worth a whole lot of points. Not so smart now, are you?

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Park Slope Pavilion and Cobble Hill Cinemas.

Dark Matter:

The Plot: Chinese astrophysics student comes to study in America. Things go wrong.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: At the very least, this sounds intriguing. It is an indie movie (and it looks it) that drew the attention of both Aidan Quinn and Meryl Streep. The film hasn’t gotten a whole lot of press thus far, but here are some spoilers (SPOILERS!) that might make one believe that the film will get a bit more attention after this weekend.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: CC Village Cinemas East in Manhattan.

The Visitor:

The Plot: A middle-aged teacher befriends an illegal alien who teaches him to play the African drum.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: The Visitor is from the director of The Station Agent and stars Richard Jenkins. Jenkins is an actor who you’ve probably identified as “ohh…that guy!” in several thousand movies. He has worked with everyone from The Farrelly Brothers to David O. Russell and is finally becoming a leading man (strangely in a drama instead of a comedy). Advance reviews are great.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Landmark Sunshine.

Richard Jenkins. That guy.

Young @ Heart:

The Plot: Old people sing rock songs.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Apparently this is a good documentary. It’s about old people singing songs by The Ramones, Coldplay, The Clash, etc. I’m a little skeptical (hence, the site name). Once you get over the gimmick of old people singing songs, is there really that much more to this movie? Won’t it play like an extended version of the grandma in The Wedding Singer singing Rapper’s Delight?

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Union Square.

Pink Floyd’s The Wall is playing at the Landmark Sunshine tomorrow night at midnight, and the Dogma 6 film Julien Donkey-Boy is playing at the IFC Center tomorrow night at midnight. Planet B-Boy has also opened at BAM.

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Leatherheads: 

The Plot: George Clooney plays football in a 1920’s romantic sports comedy.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: The reviews so far are pretty average, but I have faith in Mr. Clooney, especially when he’s directing (Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, Good Night and Good Luck). Whether or not it’s the work of art that his previous Edward R. Murrow biopic was, it looks like a fun Howard Hawks style romance with some slapstick and fun actors (minus Rene Zellwegger).

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: Cobble Hill Cinemas, United Artists on Court Street and the Pavilion.

Nim’s Island

The Plot: There’s an island in Abigail Breslin’s imagination? Or something?

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Probably not. Unless you’re a kid. In which case, you’re probably not reading this blog. I used to think that Jodie Foster starring in a movie was a good sign because she only makes so many. Then I saw The Brave One.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

The Ruins

The Plot: Americans travel to Cancun, go on an archeological expedition, meet angry Mayans, and get attacked by a weird plant thing that gets under your skin. It has yet to receive an endorsement from the Mexican Board of Travel.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Hm…I’m torn. While this looks like yet another xenophobic horror movie (Hostel, Turistas), it was also written by Scott B. Smith, a novelist and screenwriter who also wrote the 1998 Sam Raimi movie A Simple Plan (which I’m pretty sure was my mother’s least favorite movie of all time). Also, the film stars Jena Malone. If you’re not familiar with Ms. Malone, she starred in Donnie Darko, Saved! and The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys. More importantly, however, Ms. Malone once smiled at me when we both ate dinner at the same restaurant (you say coincedence, I say fate).

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

Jena Malone – I felt a connection. Did you? Or was it just me? I think there was something there.

Shine A Light

The Plot: The Rolling Stones play Beacon Theater and Martin Scorcese films it.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes (if you’re a Rolling Stones fan). The last time Martin Scorcese directed a concert film was The Last Waltz. Now, he’s older, wiser, and directing a film about a band that he has been obsessed with since he started making movies. Also, hearing the interaction between the band and Scorcese (Mick Jagger constantly calling him “Marty”) should be amusing. If anything, it will serve as proof that Keith Richards is still alive (and singing!). Also, look for celebrity guests like Jack White, Bill Clinton, Christina Aguilera and Buddy Guy.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: BAM.

The Flight of the Red Balloon

The Plot: I wish it were a combination of this film and this film. It’s not. Juliette Binoche is a single mother who hires a Taiwanese babysitter to look after her kids. 

Is it worth eleven dollars?: It sounds like it. Reviews so far are quite good and the trailer is quite interesting. Director Hsiao-hsien Hou has been nominated for the Golden Palm six times, and won the Jury Prize at Cannes back in 1993. In fact, check out this insane list of awards for which he’s been nominated or won.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: IFC Center in Manhattan.

My Blueberry Nights

The Plot: A woman breaks up with her boyfriend and decides to travel the States, meeting a collection of strange people.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Yes. Although the reviews so far are mixed, Wong Kar Wai is a visionary director and has some big fans here at Brooklyn Skeptic. For his first English Language film, he has chosen an interesting group of actors, including musician Norah Jones, Jude Law, Rachel Weisz and the always awesome David Strathairn. Wong Kar Wai is also speaking tonight at The Times Center. It’s sold out, so if anyone has an extra ticket, contact oneiroi in the comments.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Angelika.

Sex and Death 101

The Plot: A guy receives an email telling him every person he has ever had sex with, as well as everyone he will ever have sex with in the future.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: I don’t think so. The trailer looks pretty stupid. It was, however, written by the guy who wrote Heathers (Daniel Waters). Based on this article though, it doesn’t even sound like he particularly likes the film.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: CC Village Cinemas East.

The Muppet Movie is playing at The Landmark Sunshine as the midnight movie tomorrow night, and Kids is playing at the IFC Center tomorrow night at midnight as well. In Brooklyn, Snow Angels opens at BAM tomorrow, and Chapter 27 is opening at Cobble Hill Cinemas.

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21: 

The Plot: A college kid joins a group of math geniuses to earn money for med school by counting cards at a Vegas casino.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. I saw this at a screening earlier this week. While it had a sort of entertaining first half, it quickly folds (PUN WHAT WHAT?) into a collection of cliches and predictable plot lines. Kevin Spacey is fun playing the character he seems to always play, Kate Bosworth is hot, and the kid from the worst movie ever doesn’t get too annoying. It’s worth renting.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Prospect Park Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

Superhero Movie:

The Plot: A spoof of superhero movies from the guy who brought you a bunch of other shitty spoofs.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. This looks better than the recent collection of shitty spoofs (Date Movie, Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans), but, then again, so does a hernia. It’s funny that the majority of these movies need to put what genre they’re spoofing right there in the title. I think it’s because they’re trying to capture an audience that is so fucking stupid that they wouldn’t otherwise know.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Prospect Park Pavilion, United Artists on Court Street.

This man is stupid.

Stop-Loss:The Plot: A group of young men from a small town are called back to active duty in the Iraq War, and take off their shirts in protest.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: I would say yes. Although I found it interesting when I saw the trailer that Kimberly Pierce’s follow-up to her Oscar winning film Boys Don’t Cry seems to be about…boys crying. All the same, there’s a collection of strong young actors including Ryan Phillipe, Channing Tatum, Rob Brown and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Iraq movies haven’t been doing so well (Rendition, Lions for Lambs, In The Valley of Elah, Redacted – seen any of these?) but this has been getting some okay advanced reviews and could break the funk by featuring less preachiness and more hot Texan dudes getting naked.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Prospect Park Pavilion.

Run, Fat Boy, Run:

The Plot: Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead) runs a marathon to impress his ex-fiancee.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: Probably not. There are, however, some interesting people involved in this productions. Michael Ian Black wrote the original script, which was re-written by Simon Pegg. The location changed from the United States to London and David Schwimmer directed. I want to like this movie. But I don’t think I will. Sorry bearclaws.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Union Square.

Flawless:

The Plot: Demi Moore and Michael Caine steal diamonds.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: I don’t really know anything about this movie, and I don’t really need to. Demi Moore and Michael Caine steal fucking diamonds? Can you think of a plot that is sexier than that? Seriously, try. I dare you.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Landmark Sunshine.

Chapter 27:

The Plot: Jared Leto is Mark David Chapman, the man who shot John Lennon. And then, judging by the picture below, ate him.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. Who asked for a movie about this? Advanced reviews are terrible. Oh yeah, and Lindsay Lohan is in it.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Appropriately, at the Angelika.

Priceless:

The Plot: A gold digger mistakes a bartender for a wealthy suitor, but then falls in love with him anyway…after wacky hijinks, mind you.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. What is it with the French and mistaken identity comedies? There are plenty of other tired comedic formulas that you can drive into the ground.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Cobble Hill Cinemas.

A Boy and His Dog is playing as the midnight movie at the Sunshine tonight. Also, check out this website for the New Directors/New Films series, playing through April 6th.

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Drillbit Taylor:

The Plot: A bunch of nerds hire a bodyguard to protect them from high school bullies. For some reason, the bodyguard’s name is Drillbit.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. We’re going to get plenty of Judd Apatow produced movies this year, including Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Step Brothers and The Pineapple Express. This definitely looks like the worst of them. Seth Rogen may have helped write it, but it’s also being directed by Stephen Brill, who has given us shit movies like Mr. Deeds and Without A Paddle (he directed Heavy Weights too, but that doesn’t get him a free ride).

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan? Park Slope Pavilion and United Artists on Court Street.

Please contact me if you’d like to do a double feature of this and Little Giants.

Shutter:

The Plot: Another tired looking remake of an Asian horror movie.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. Time and time again, horror directors have taken foreign films and remade them with B-actors (sorry Joshua Jackson). And every time, they suck. Why not try something original? This wasn’t even that original from the beginning. It’s yet another movie about ghosts hiding in some form of technology. There has been Pulse (ghosts in the internet), One Missed Call (ghosts in the cell phone), The Ring (ghosts in a VHS tape – how retro!) and now this. Soon we’re going to get ahead of ourselves. Although a movie about a ghost who writes a blog would be pretty fantastic. Okay fine, I’m going to start writing that screenplay right now.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: United Artists on Court Street.

Tyler Perry’s Meet the Browns:

The Plot: A woman finds out her father isn’t dead, and goes to Georgia to meet him.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: I’ve never seen a Tyler Perry movie, so I can’t really say. While he doesn’t always do too well with critics, Perry has a pretty incredible following and has made a large group of films in the past couple of years.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Park Slope Pavilion.

Planet B-Boy:

The Plot: Documentary about people who breakdance.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: Probably not, although early buzz is good. The trailer was also interesting because it was not about just Americans, but people around the world who compete in an international breakdancing competition. All the same, I doubt that this needs to be seen on the big screen unless you are really into breakdancing.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Landmark Sunshine.

Under the Same Moon:

The Plot: A young Mexican kid travels from a small town in Mexico to California to find his mother.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: No. I’ve seen the trailer a couple of times. It looks really corny. I mean, even the title is corny.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: Cobble Hill Cinemas and BAM.

The Hammer:

The Plot: Adam Carolla spends ninety minutes trying to convince us that he’s funny, and not just a no talent douchebag.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: Fuck no. A friend of the Skeptic has seen this already and can confirm that this movie sucks. You may remember Adam Corrolla as the co-host of Loveline. He had the wonderful talent of making his audience feel uncomfortable and nauseous both at once. And who could forget The Man Show? A show that was so politically incorrect that it actually forgot to be funny as well. This movie looks like more of the same. And let’s hope that the title refers to what will be driving the nail into Corrolla’s career.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: AMC Empire 25 in Midtown.

The Grand:

The Plot: People compete in a national poker competition.

Is It Worth Eleven Dollars?: Yes. The cast includes Chris Parnell, David Cross, Woody Harrelson, Micheal McKean, Richard Kind, Dennis Farina, Cheryl Hines and Werner Herzog (as a psychotic German card shark who murders small animals). Although there was a loose script, the comedians were all allowed to improvise as much as they wanted. The trailer looks pretty hilarious.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/Manhattan?: CC Village East Cinemas on Second Ave. 

Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is the midnight show at the Sunshine tomorrow night, and Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure is also playing at the IFC Center at midnight tomorrow night.

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Doomsday:

The Plot: There’s some kind of virus that forces England to split in two, as they build a wall around the infected. Someone goes back in to the quarantined area, and a crazy action movie ensues.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: I doubt it. There is one interesting thing though. There are plenty of movies about pseudo-apocalypses (Waterworld, Mad Max, Road Warrior, Tank Girl) In all of them, the fashions are very similar. What is it about dystopias that bring out the shoulder pads and face paint in people? Why does everyone resort to looking like a tribal 1980’s business woman on steroids? It makes little sense to me. In any case, this looks pretty similar to those movies. The only thing this movie has going for it is that it was directed by the same guy (Neil Marshall) who directed Dog Soldiers and The Descent: two wonderful horror films. And the woman in it looks like Victoria Beckham. So if you want to see a futuristic movie about Posh Spice killing infected thugs with face paint and shoulder pads, then this is the movie for you.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Pavilion and the United Artists on Court Street.

Dr. Seuss’ Horton Hears a Who:

The Plot: Dr. Seuss’ story of an elephant who finds a universe inside a flower.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Probably not. It’s still my pick of the week though. While I had high hopes for this movie due to the vocal talent (Steve Carell, Jim Carrey, Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, Amy Poehler) involved, pizappas and johnbaptisedme reminded me of other Dr. Seuss adaptations like The Grinch (also with Jim Carrey) and The Cat in the Hat. Oh yeah, and I’m the asshole who saw Seussical the Musical, which, if you didn’t know, was a Broadway musical that took all of Dr. Seuss’ stories, rolled them all into one and then sodomized them. I’m still holding my breath for a cool adaptation of Butter Battle Book.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Pavilion, Cobble Hill Cinemas and the United Artists on Court Street.

Never Back Down:

The Plot: Stomp the Yard meets The Karate Kid meets Fight Club. But suckier looking than all three. Bonus: Djimon Hounsou!

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Um…no. Not at all. Despite the awesome sounding plot. A rebellious teenager goes to a new school and starts fighting in an underground fight club. Because that’s what high school is like, right? Who could forget the cafeteria, passing notes in history class, playing dodgeball in gym, the underground fight clubs, social studies. I miss high school.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?: The Pavilion and the United Artists on Court Street.

Funny Games:

The Plot: Two young guys play a twisted game with a rich family on vacation.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: Why Michael Haneke is remaking his own movie in English is kind of baffling to me. Nonetheless, here he brings his own Funny Games to Hollywood, this time starring Tim Roth, Naomi Watts and Michael Pitt. Having seen the original German film, I can tell you that it is not for the faint of heart. It’s not particularly gory, but is quite twisted and definitely not a relaxing time at the movies. The trailer for the remake has made it seem like more of a satire than it really is. But, if you’re feeling sinister, this is an interesting experience to be sure.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?:Cobble Hill Cinemas and the Angelika.

Sleepwalking:

The Plot: An 11-year-old girl is abandoned by her mother and lives with her uncle.

Is it worth eleven dollars?: It doesn’t sound like it. Despite an interesting cast including Nick Stahl, Charlize Theron, Dennis Hopper and Anna Sophia Robb, it’s getting pretty shitty advance reviews. And it’s from the same writer as Chumscrubber, which I didn’t even bother to see because it looked so bad.

Where is it playing in Brooklyn/New York?:The Landmark Sunshine.

So, pretty shitty weekend, eh? Well, if you’re in Brooklyn, I’d recommend heading to BAM, which now has Paranoid Park (you don’t have to go to the Angelika!) as well as The Counterfeiters and The Band’s Visit. If you’re in Manhattan, the IFC Center is playing a midnight show of Footloose tomorrow night, and the Sunshine is playing a midnight show of Purple Rain.

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