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Archive for the ‘smoking’ Category

Gridskipper came up with a guide to drunk-making stuff made in Brooklyn and Manhattan! Way to go! Perhaps a reprise of the Brooklyn Skeptic Brooklyn Beer tasting is in order?

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VMAs = Yawn.

The MTV Video Music Awards were last night. I pretty much grew out of this particular awards show about six years ago, but I still watch them. Out of respect. For my youth. But as usual they weren’t anything spectacular. Britney performed her new single, though. Which was pretty exciting. Although her performance was overall a disappointment. Rumors were swirling that Criss “Mindfreak ” Angel and the Brit were going to join forces for this particular performance. But apparently that’s just what they were…rumors. Dirty, dirty, get your hopes up rumors. If you don’t know who Criss Angel is, here’s a video of the time he was able to make some lady’s torso run away from her legs.

The show overall was pretty uneventful. I’m tired today, so I’m not going to write up a full review. As if I do that, ever. But what I will do is leave with you this photo of MTV News correspondent John Norris.

You can’t really tell how insane he looks here, as this photo was clearly taken from someone’s phone, but trust me, he looks weird and creepy. It’s one thing to make that decision to transform your wardrobe and brush off any preconceived thoughts people might have about you and totally revamp your persona. It’s not like I’ve never done that before (hey, I didn’t always wear glasses). But to take your look and morph it from something relatively plain into an image that could be compared to new Jared Leto is not a change I would recommend. At least not without expecting ridicule from normal human beings. Especially when you’re over 40 years old and appear daily on MTV where the public eye can witness your mid-life crisis. I’m just saying, baby steps.

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The Brooklyn wino has many choices when it comes to “scoring juice” in the Carroll Gardens area. But of course, we know not all wine shops are created equal. Frankly, the area spanning Court/Atlantic to Smith/9th street is littered with average wine shops (Scotto’s, Carroll Gardens Wine & Liquor, Vintage Cellars, The-Bullet-Proof-Window-Liquor-Store, etc.) that just provide your standard Yellowtail Shiraz meets “I’m Francis Coppola and I’m Buying This Vineyard” selection. These places are fine if you just need a bottle of Jameson and want to shoot the shit with the owner. But hey, let’s get real. This is Brooklyn and I expect a perhaps smallish but exotic and carefully picked assortment of well priced, worldly wines.

And this is what you get at Smith & Vine, the only store in this whole area that has truly sent me out the door murmuring a Cartman-like “sweeeet” with a happy jaunt in my step. You can tell the quality selection here by the lovingly labeled descriptions placed on each bottle coupled with the fact that there isn’t overwhelming amounts of dusty inventory stacked to the ceilings. Plus, the friendly staff always seems to be drinking and that can only be good, right?

S&V’s single best feature is the “10$ and under” table, which is the store’s centerpiece. One side is dedicated to reds and the other side white, with about ten bottles on each side. It’s tough to go wrong here, and I made it my beeswax for a whole year to try out as many as I could. For me, it sealed S&V’s spot as “most kick-ass wine shop in Carroll Gardens.”

smithandvine.jpg

Another advantage of S&V is their sister cheese shop “Stinky” located across the street. These shops are totally in sync, and everyone knows what’s up. This really makes things easy when you’re shopping for Wine & Cheese night. Stinky’s got some great stuff, and also sells crackers, quince paste, cured meats (Christ, they have “guanciale”) and duck confit. Those close to me know I believe ducks to be a superior species.

Smith and Vine
268 Smith Street
(718) 243-2864

Pros:

  • The 10$ and under table is a Brooklyn landmark.
  • Wine selection is given a lot of care and well labeled
  • Great opening hours
  • Sister cheese store across the street
  • Excellent website

Cons:

  • The staff’s a bit jaded, but it might be ‘cause they’re drunk all the time.

You Can’t Go Wrong With: Domaine De La Batardière (white) – a crisp , dry and flavorful Muscadet from the Loire Valley (France, genius), this is the ultimate summer wine and perfect for that romantic picnic in Prospect Park or just a booze-soaked Sunday.

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All this steak talk has inspired me to bring to the table one of the hottest foodie topics right now: the pairing of food with cocktails. Here’s a great drink our resident mixologist has sacrificed an afternoon of work to bring you…the Basil Mojito. (Yes, we merely replaced mint with basil).

Ingredients:

Bacardi Limon (Regular Bottle or Handle)
Basil Leaves
Limes
Club Soda
Sugar

Method:

In a rocks glass, drop in 1 quartered lime, a small handful of fresh basil leaves, and one large tablespoon of granulated sugar. We prefer to do the whole thing in a big punch bowl, in which case you multiply all the ingredients by 10.

With a muddler, or a wooden spoon, muddle (i.e. “smash”) the hell out of the ingredients. The sugar will help macerate the lime and get all the juice out, and result in a nice layer of thick greenish syrup on the bottom. For the glass, fill with with ice and proceed to pour in Bacardi Limon light rum until there is only a half inch left of room left. Mix using a shaker or a pint glass. Top off with a splash of club soda, stick in a straw and enjoy. The straw will stop the basil from getting stuck in your teeth. If using the big punch bowl, just pour in the whole handle of rum and add a 12oz bottle of club soda. Mix.

If you really want to impress , slice a cucumber into thin wheels and use as a garnish on the side of the glass. Make sure you fill your glass with ice before every refill.

Warning: This drink will make your guests VERY sociable, and you’ll truly be damned at just how much quasi-straight liquor you can actually drink. It’s really quite remarkable.

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Okay, I really love Lindsay Lohan. She has very shiny hair. She was awesome in Mean Girls and Freaky Friday. She drinks like a scruffy Irishman.

But she is dumb and her dumbness is going to be her downfall. This weekend, Miss Lohan was in her third car accident in two years. For the record, that’s a lot. But wait. More stupidity:

1. It was a single car accident, which means that a curb duped her. Not even a moving object.
2. She was drunk (allegedly – she has to answer those charges in August). And yes, she was in rehab earlier this year.
3. She had some cocaine in the car with her. Again, rehab. This year.

Additional things to consider in the realm of the Lohan.

1. She was drunk and she’s 20: illegal.
2. She was drunk and driving: illegal and incredibly dangerous.
3. She had cocaine!

I’m just saying, why is she not in jail? Why wasn’t she arrested? Why wasn’t her license suspended? Why didn’t she get a ticket? What the fuck is going on here?

It’s not that I want her to be in jail, because I love her and her wacky antics. I don’t care if she’s doing more coke than David Bowie in ’71 and I don’t care if she’s drinking until she’s puking up a spaghetti dinner she ate when she was 12. But she’s just being reckless now. There were other people in her car and other people driving in general. Take her license away and get the bitch a driver. She’s rich.

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New York Magazine posted a tantalizing item today in their “Grub Street” food blog – the existence of a bar that serves moonshine in Brooklyn. The author would not reveal the name of the bar, but I think that a budding Nancy Drew/Hardy Boy among our readers could probably figure it out based on the clues in the article. If anyone can identify the bar, their first shot of moonshine is on me. Seriously.

Embedded clues:

1. “There’s a saloon in Brooklyn that will pull [moonshine] from under the bar if you ask nicely.” – The bar is in Brooklyn and it has a bar in it with moonshine under it.

2. “We won’t give away the place’s identity, but we will tell you to look for a bulldog.” – The bar has a bulldog in or near it. Possibly real, possibly a statue. Rule nothing out.

3. “We were recently treated to a few eye-popping, sinus-destroying shots, poured from the obligatory Mason jar.” – Patrons suffering from terrible allergies. Not unlike all New Yorkers this week.

4. “We called later to request it for a friend’s birthday party.” – The bar has a telephone. In it, presumably.

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The Gowanus Lounge told me that Brooklyn Brewery might move into Smith & 5th!

I once made the trek out to the industrial boneyard that is W-burg to celebrate a fellow blogger’s b-day at the Brewery, and it was great. The only bad part was getting there. And getting back.

Yay beer gardens! I’m thirsty.

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