While most of you readers are busy spending your time not watching musicals (losers), I have spent the better half of this past year investing as much free time as possible to the genre. What can I say, I love a good sing-a-long. Especially if it includes a tender-hearted Captain Von Trapp expressing his love to Fraulein Maria through the “Something Good” lyrics. (God Damn, you, Christopher Plummer, why must you own my soul?) Anyway, during my sporadic musical marathon, I couldn’t help but notice something lacking in recently released musicals. Something called…quality. And while I may refuse to turn the channel whenever Encore Drama airs “RENT,” that doesn’t mean it’s a particularly good movie. It simply means that I love choreographed dance sequences. Though, who doesn’t? I mean, come on.
However, I do feel as though this questionable-musical dry spell is ending. During this phase of mine, as my film viewings tend to run in phases, like that time I watched every Christian Bale movie throughout the course of a week (I call that my best phase EVER), I saw not one, but two tune-influenced, incredibly entertaining movies released in the 2006-07 year. These two movies being HSM (that’s “High School Musical” to the layperson) and “Hairspray.” Now, I’m not going to lie. If you’re over the age of 20…or 13, you may not have heard of or seen HSM, since it was only aired on the Disney Channel. And as much as I hate to admit it, not every 24 year-old holds such dear fondness towards Disney original movies as I do, making me somewhat abnormal. Although, don’t act like you haven’t seen at least one Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen movie.
Also, the HSM soundtrack was the number one selling album charted on Billboard’s top 100 for the entire 2006 year. Just to give you an idea regarding the movie’s popularity. So stop judging me. In any case, I might suggest watching “Hairspray” over HSM to anyone that can’t handle the tween goodness of HSM. And while one can’t really compare the “Hairspray” remake to the John Waters’ classic, it’s great, great fun. Especially once you get over imagining how disturbed Kelly Preston must’ve been watching John Travolta so gracefully prance around a plus-sized boutique in a pink sequined dress.
But the main component linking these two musicals together, and hence making them both spectacular is this guy:
Zac Efron. Total dreamboat. I realize it’s completely inappropriate to have an actual crush on him, since he’s like, 12, but it’s also inappropriate to make an STD joke. Where does one draw the line? Not here, obvs. I also heard that Efron was cast to play the lead in the “Footloose” musical film adaptation. This boy is going to single-handedly bring back the art of sung dialogue. Mark my words.
So in conclusion, I think the musical is coming back. And to all you haters:
(Love it or leave it.)