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Archive for June, 2007

Zach Galifianakis, along with Band of Horses, will be holding an auction of “bad art” in Manhattan on July 10th, 2007. Tickets are thirty bucks ($33.75 with tax), and are on sale now. Having seen Mr. Galifianakis perform a few times, I can say that it will undoubtedly be an interesting evening, and well worth the ticket price. All the money made goes to New York Cares. If you are unfamiliar with Zach Galifianakis, here is a short video of one of his jokes (and there’s plenty more on youtube).

So basically, it’s good comedy, good music, a good cause and shitty art. What’s not to love?

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The owners of Red, White and Bubbly, Park Slope’s wine destination, are trying to meet all of my needs – not just by fueling my alcoholism, but by fueling my love of all things Brooklyn.

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That’s right! We, as a borough, now have our very own wine company…in a manner of speaking, I suppose. If you want to be technical about it, the grapes are grown, fermented, mixed and bottled in California. But the guy who designed the label totally lives in Brooklyn! And the only place it is currently sold is in Brooklyn. So that’s close enough, right?

I tried the “Feliz Red” last night. I wasn’t crazy about it, but it might have been that it just doesn’t pair well with a black bean burger and garlic scrapes. Or it could be that I just wasn’t doing it right. The instructions say to “celebrate a day well lived” with it, but I was actually just watching The OC and painting my toe nails. The owners of Brooklyn Wine Co. & Red, White and Bubbly feel different, of course. They said to the Brooklyn Paper, “it’s not so much that we create a good wine, but that we create a fantastic wine. And if we’re going to put our names on a bottle of wine, we want it to knock your socks off.”

It’s true that my socks were off, but that was because of the pedicure…or was it?

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Yes, I know I’m flagrantly biting Pizappas’ schtick, but I’d like to take a moment to discuss a new, fulfilling relationship I have in my life. I’ve fallen deeply in love with the Park Slope CSA. It nurtures my body with crazy, fresh, organic produce I would never be able to afford otherwise and it nurtures my soul with fruity politics and community spirit.

For those of you who are not familiar, CSA is “Community Supported Agriculture.” Basically, one neighborhood teams up with a farm and buys one season’s worth of produce up front. For the next 5 months or so, the farm carts the produce down to a single location once a week. On the designated pick-up day, all of the neighbors who signed up for a share come get their heap of vegetables or fruit or flowers or eggs or meat or whatever they signed up for.

This is a nice thing because:

1. You eat and learn how to prepare vegetables you’ve never heard of before (i.e. garlic scapes or butter lettuce).

2. It’s cheaper than buying organic or even regular produce at a grocery store and most farmer’s markets. I’m just saying, it’s like $5 for a bunch of asparagus in my grocery store.

3. The farms are committed to organic, sustainable agriculture. So you know the food you’re getting is safe to eat (no e. coli for me!) and is not overly aggressive to the land it’s raised on.

4. It’s an energy efficient method of getting food. All of the food is grown reasonably locally (like 100 miles, as opposed to 4000 miles away). No need for airplanes, boats, etc. Additionally, because it’s delivered to one central neighborhood location, there is no wasted gas for deliveries and most people can walk their food home.

5. It’s good for independent farming because farmers get money when they need it (at the beginning of the season) and have a guaranteed market for their produce.

Okay, that is all I have to say about that. But if you’re interested in finding a CSA, the following Brooklyn neighborhoods have one:

Bed-Stuy
Brooklyn Heights
Carroll Gardens
Clinton Hill/Ft. Greene
Cobble Hill
East New York
East Williamsburg (845-943-8699)
Greenwood Heights
Kensington/Windsor Terrace
Park Slope
Prospect Heights
Prospect/Lefferts Garden
Red Hook
Williamsburg

And if you’re a sucker and you live somewhere else, you can find a CSA by state or ZIP code here.

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Nothing says “New York” to me like consumerism and touching multiculturalism.

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Look Out Behind You

Speaking of flightless monsters, I now have something else to have nightmares about. Five foot tall penguins.

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Why didn’t we know about this terrifying penguin-incarnation earlier? Penguin expert, Julia Clarke explains, “we have so few relatively complete penguins from that period of penguin evolution.” Penguin, penguin, penguin.

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Chilling Realizations

This just in: Newsweek has posted an article about how dumb Americans are.

Yeah, yeah. I think the one thing we all definitively know is that we are, as a nation, borderline retarded.

While taking the poll myself (with the answers right below each question), I realized that I’m just as American (read: dumb) as the next guy. This was my favorite question:

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The reason “no” is highlighted is because it is the correct answer. Does this seem weird to anyone else? Is this a question that could logically have a “yes” or “no” answer? If it was, would “no” really be the correct answer?

It’s true that some people didn’t know the right answer to a lot of questions (for the record, SUVs definitely contribute to global warming). But more importantly – and I think this speaks more to the American way than sheer stupidity – we didn’t even try to answer a lot of questions. For most of the questions in the poll, “Don’t Know/Refused” was the first or second most selected answer. Well, at least we’re not cocky.

Thankfully, America got its comeuppance with the following questions:

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Yeah, fuck you, Newsweek! That’s right! More Americans know who Jane Austen is than Jordin Sparks. Though not me, admittedly. Again, though, these questions illustrate our preference for admitting our ignorance openly (48% and 78% respectively just didn’t know).

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King Hot Dog Takeru Kobayashi may be unable to compete in this year’s extravaganza July 4th Hot Dog Eating Competition!

 Arthritis of the jaw has rendered him “all but paralyzed.”

 In the face of the daily, brutal war that Kobayashi faces against stomach-stretching quantities of food, Kobayashi laments, “My jaw refused to fight anymore … [it] has abandoned the frontline.”

 With the condo-building on Coney Island and this hot dog tragedy, what’s next? How much must we bear?

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