Weekend at the Movies

This week as a special treat, Weekend at the Movies is brought to you by pizappas, a Brooklyn Skeptic who doesn’t even have a TV. Look out for references to pop culture that I gleaned four years ago.

Elizabeth: The Golden Ages: I think this is a prequel to Cate Blanchett starring as the elf queen in LOTR. Right? No, I guess as queen of Scotland or something. Britainia? Anyway, one of my fave young adult novels growing up was about a young lady whose father was a low level bard in Queen Elizabeth’s England. I will brush up on that before I don’t go see this movie. I suggest you do the same. This is playing at the Pavilion and Cobble Hill Cinemas.

We Own the Night: Joaquin Phoenix and Mark Wahlberg star in the new genre of action-adventure movies that pretend not to be eye candy binges and are wrapped in the guise of a real plot. They are brothers that set out to protect their chief of police daddy from Russian mobsters. I guess somewhere along the way they buy the night. I didn’t know that the Russian mobsters owned the night. But I guess not anymore. This is playing at the Pavilion and the United Artists on Court Street.

The Final Season: Sean Astin. Sports. Hangdog team. Inspiration. Win one last season.

Tyler Perry’s Why did I get Married?: Answer: because the woman in question is Miss Janet Jackson. No, but what’s the deal with movies that are about marriage whose title is phrased as a question? I guess the only other film in this burgeoning genre is Chris Rock’s I Think I Love My Wife. And I guess that’s not really a question with a question mark so much as a questioning statement. A statement with a questioning tone. Have I ever seen a Tyler Perry movie? In all honesty, no. But I do love Janet, and insightful commentaries on societal institutions like marriage. So maybe I’ll give this a shot, if I get a free pass (call me Mr. Perry). This is playing at the Pavilion and the United Artists on Court Street.
courtesy of prisonart.org

Control: A well done, depressing biopic of Joy Division front man Ian Curtis. Probably worth watching both for the music and the indie street cred. Make sure to wear your skinny jeans and American Apparel deep v tee. See it at Film Forum and not the craptacular Angelika.

Lars and the Real Girl: Ryan Gosling talks frankly about his relationship with Alanis Morisette. Ha ha I’m just kidding. Ryan REYNOLDS (I get them confused sometimes) dated Alanis Morisette. Gosling stars in this movie where he buys a life-size inflatable sex doll and falls in love with her and thinks she’s real. I saw a Disney original movie once called Life Size starring a little girl named LiLo who loved her Barbie so much that she wished she would come to life and then she did and it was Tyra Banks! So I am wishing Ryan Gosling all the best on this one. If his creepy little mustache has anything to say about it, then I think things will work out for him in the end. This is playing at the Angelika.

King Corn: This is a documentary about 2 dudes who decide that their way to contribute to the growing movement of awareness about where our food comes from is to buy a super small plot of farmland and grow some corn. But they don’t do it in any hippie dippie way, they do it just like the real commodity farmers do. I saw a sneak preview of this one a few months back and it’s definitely worth seeing. If the Michael Pollans and self-righteous Greenmarket shoppers don’t appeal to you, this is a good intro to the ways the government impacts our food supply. This is playing at Cinema Village.

Sleuth: Yahoo! Movies writes: The updated story of a wealthy writer of detective stories, and an aspiring yet out-of-work actor who is having an affair with the writer’s wife. The writer’s exquisitely modernized Georgian manor, becomes the backdrop for a cat and mouse game that pits one creative mind against another.
I like this because everything is backward! How could an actor who has ASPIRATIONS be out of work? He aspires, YET does not succeed. Already I know that this movie (or the blurb writer for yahoo) is well grounded in reality. The misplaced comma in the second sentence lets me know that it’s probably the blurb writer’s fault. This stars Michael Caine (of Secondhand Lions, Miss Congeniality, and the Muppet Christmas Carol fame) and Jude Law (of nannysexgate fame). This is playing at the Sunshine.

Terror’s Advocate: This documentary investigates Jacques Verges, a high profile lawyer made famous defending Nazis and Holocaust-deniers. That’s all I know about this but it sounds interesting. This is playing at the IFC Center.